How do Danes make their children so happy, optimistic and confident? 5-point answer.
1. Cultivate ‘hygge’ as a family
Surely you have heard of the Danish “hygge” (pronounced “huggueu”)? It can be translated as “spend quality time with family or friends”. The Danes raised hygiene as a way of life. These moments of conviviality reinforce the sense of belonging.
Do it at home. Share a family activity. For example, get started in making a big mural altogether. The hygge, it can also sing a song with several voices. Why not create a repertoire of family songs?
2. Experiment without preventing
In Denmark, parents practice the concept of the “Proximal Development Zone” with their children. They are in the accompaniment, but they offer the child a space to experiment. By exploring, climbing … the child feels in control of his challenges and difficulties. He also learns to manage the level of danger and stress that his brain will be able to support.
Do it at home. Let him climb, try … without intervening! Yes, it forces him to turn his tongue 7 times in his mouth when he sees his child make the pig hanged!
3. Crop positively
Far from being happy idiots, the Danes practice “positive reframing”. For example, if it rains on a holiday day, a Dane will exclaim: “Chic, I’ll curl up on the couch with my children,” instead of curse the sky. Thus, Danish parents, facing a situation where the child is blocked, help him redirect his attention to transform the situation to better live it.
Do it at home. Our child tells us he is “no football”? Acknowledge that this time he did not play well while asking him to remember the times he scored goals.
4. Develop empathy
In Denmark, empathy classes are compulsory at school. At school, children learn to express their feelings authentically. They say they are disappointed, worried … Empathy improves the sense of belonging.
Do it at home. If your child wants to make fun of a classmate, encourage him to talk about himself: “How did you feel when he told you that? Maybe he feels bad too? ”
5. Encourage free play
At the Danish kindergarten (under 7 years old), all the time is spent on the game. The children have fun to continue, to fight for forgery, to play the aggressor and the aggressed. By practicing these games, they develop their self-control and learn to cope with conflicts. Through free play, the child learns to better regulate his emotions.
Do it at home. Let your child play freely. Alone or with others, but without parental intervention. If the game escalates, ask them, “Are you still playing or are you fighting for real? “